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The Biggest Skirt in All the Land

Posted on 4 min read
50s-inspired polka dot skirt and high heels
full polka dot skirt
polka dot skirt and bardot top

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So, I like big skirts: you all know that by now.

You also probably know that I like my big skirts to have a lot of structure – so, ideally I like them to be made from the kind of fabric that will puff out all by itself, without any need for a petticoat. Because I like petticoats too, you see, but there’s basically never a situation in my life when a tulle petticoat is considered appropriate (Not that it’s stopped me in the past, mind you…), and I feel that a skirt that LOOKS like it might have a petticoat underneath it, but which DOESN’T have a petticoat underneath it – well, that’s appropriate for EVERYTHING, isn’t it? And no one can ever say, “Oooh, you’re all dressed up!” because then you can just be all, “Who, me? Nope, not even wearing a petticoat over here or anything – I just threw this on, in fact!”

So, I’m no stranger to big skirts, is what I’m saying, but this one was honestly a bit of a surprise even to me. Because this skirt is HUGE, people. It’s… well, it’s actually not quite as huge as it looks in these photos – the wind was helping it out a bit there – but it’s still absolutely gigantic, basically. And so is the black version. Which I ALSO got, because D’UH, do you even GO here? Together, they made for one mighty big parcel, which I had to go to the post office to collect, on account of how the postman always arrives when we’re out. (Honestly, you’d think that would hardly ever happen, seeing as we work from home, but you would be wrong about that. I’m actually 78% sure he hides around the corner and waits until he sees us leaving…)

Now, the post office the parcel was taken to is in the next town and, rather than driving there, I decided I would RUN there – because once you have a Fitbit, you take any opportunity going to get in some extra steps.

“Are you sure you should run there?” said Terry, watching as I put on sunblock and a waterproof jacket – two essential items for running outdoors in Scotland in the summer. “I mean, you do realise you’ll have to run BACK, too? And the parcel might be huge, for all you know?”

“Nah, I’ll be fine,” I said confidently. I had an inkling that the parcel probably contained The Skirts, and how big can skirts be, after all?

Guys, skirts can be BIG. They can be REALLY big: a fact I failed to realise until the moment the women in the post office rummaged under the counter and then produced a giant parcel – which I then had to run all the way home with, holding it out in front of me, and hoping that passers-by wouldn’t assume I’d stolen it and was now running from the cops or something. The moral of this story? Always take the car. (Um, I really hope no one thought the moral was going to be, “don’t get the skirts”. Because I will ALWAYS get the skirts…)

Anyway, these photos were taken in what Terry described as “challenging conditions”, and what I described as “OMG, will the wind EVER stop blowing, even for a second? And why is the light changing every second?!” So it was pretty un-fun, really. The out-takes are awesome, though. Oh, and while we were shooting, a lone runner went jogging by (I say “jogging” – he was running fast, uphill, and probably had a good 20 years on me. I was very glad he hadn’t seen me earlier, when I was shuffling along with a giant parcel clutched to my chest…), and, rather than rolling his eyes, like I was expecting, told me I looked beautiful. Then he told me I was still beautiful when he passed us again a little while later – him probably having run a half marathon by that time, me still struggling to keep my skirt out of my face. Anyway, it helps restore my faith in humanity when people take the time to be nice to a poor fashion blogger flashing her underwear on the roadside (And, I mean, I don’t THINK that’s why he commented?), so thank you, kind runner-man: you made my day…

polka dot skirt and bardot top
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WEARING: Polka dot skirt c/o Choies; H&M top; Studio TMLS shoes*; Unique Vintage sunglasses;

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  • Chiarina
    August 5, 2015

    I laughed out loud at the image of you running with a huge box held out in front of you. I would do that kind of thing all the time, totally underestimating size and weight of stuff I have to carry back and forth (because I love to walk and would just walk anywhere if I could), but luckily my partner is a bit more down-to-earth than me and often talks me out of things.
    Oh, and I love how random strangers can make your day with a nice comment. It happened a few weeks ago for no particular reason but because I was out alone and wearing a silk skirt, it totally made my day (I also hope it wasn’t because I accidentally flashed him…? The skirt was light and floaty..)
    I really enjoy reading your blog.

  • Rosanna
    August 5, 2015

    As soon as I read the first line of this post I started humming the song ‘I like big (skirts) and I cannot lie’
    It’s now stuck in my head!

    • Amber
      August 5, 2015

      I was going to use that as the title, but I already have a post called that so I couldn’t – gah!

    • Cory
      August 5, 2015

      Ha! The same thing happened to me.

      *continues humming song under breath*

  • The Other Emma
    August 5, 2015

    You look gorgeous as always! Lovely to have someone make a nice comment like that, it’s always makes my day when a randomer says something nice so I try to do it too when I see something that I like or think someone looks lovely.

    I may have also bought the giant skirt by accidentally clicking on the link above just for a look (and then adding it to my basket and paying for it………………….)

    • Amber
      August 5, 2015

      I’ve made accidental purchases that way too – bummer, isn’t it 😉

  • Stacy
    August 5, 2015

    Lovely! And a great story to give me a smile after a morning of very annoying work!

    As for an occasion to wear a petticoat – I call that going to work (OK, I know you work from home). Sure, it’s a little out there compared to outfits others wear, but I have never got bad comments (and even got a complement from an ex-leader of of the Dutch green party when she visited the office).

    the petticoat is, however, a pain in the neck and not practical at all! (Something I always tell myself halfway through my day rather than at the beginning when I am picking what to wear…)

  • Becki
    August 5, 2015

    That skirt is gorgeous! Good price too.

    Big into spots at the minute, but BIG ones. None of this polka dot things it’s all about big statement spots (although not on your face).

    B x

  • What Lou Wore
    August 5, 2015

    I too love a big skirt to balance out higher heels or wedges. Plus I tend to find my big skirts have pockets (WIN!)

    This one is great! It’s so big it’s like a brolly for your shoes 🙂

  • Sandy
    August 5, 2015

    Got to love a massive skirt!
    Have you seen Pinup Girl Clothing’s skirts? They’re quite full and most are made from stiffer fabrics so they have some good swish.

    • Amber
      August 5, 2015

      I have, but I’m not a fan of international shipping because of the customs charges and the hassle returning stuff if it doesn’t fit. I’ll be visiting the store when I’m in LA, though, so hopefully I’ll be able to try them on then!

      • Sandy
        August 9, 2015

        There’s a shop in the UK (Frome, Somerset) that sell some of the PUG stuff called Deadly is The Female, they’re online too. I find best time to buy from PUG is when they have a yard sale and prices are slashed, I got a harlequin skirt for about £30 all in with postage too!
        (Bit late in my reply….been busy buying all the clothes for my birthday! LOL!)

  • Stella Kashmoney
    August 5, 2015

    That skirt is so pretty. Lovely pictures Amber.

  • CiCi Marie
    August 5, 2015

    I, too, love the image of you running for your life carrying a giant parcel – that sounds exactly like something I’d do, and I’d probably be blaming my Fitbit too. On the plus, the Fitbit makes me far more positive about the fact I spend every Friday lunchtime (as I work at home) trekking down to the post office, whereas before I’d basically swear a lot when I got one of those infuriating red postcards. Love the giant skirt – I feel like I should invest in more of these because they are surely easier to take on holiday than trying to squish a petticoat into a suitcase, even if they make for huge parcels??

  • Jessica Edmunds
    August 5, 2015

    Oh my gosh yes before you put on skirts like this they are MASSIVE haha but they look absolutely beautiful on so it’s all good! xx

  • Kim
    August 5, 2015

    You look absolutely stunning! I love black polka dots on a white background, it makes for such a fun statement! XO -Kim

  • Anca
    August 5, 2015

    The skirt looks amazing, I can easily understand why you bought 2 of them 🙂

  • Myra
    August 5, 2015

    You are beautiful

  • Georgina
    August 5, 2015

    I love this skirt, but love even more the story of how you got it. I love the amount of backstory that always goes into your outfit posts.

  • giorgia guazzarotti
    August 5, 2015

    What a great story. You always put a smile on my face at the end of a tiring day.

    And you look amazing in that skirt!

  • Steph
    August 6, 2015

    Oooh, I’ve been eyeing up these skirts for a while (I want both too, obvs!) love it when you buy my lust have items so I can see them in all thier glory! Might need to purchase, though I’ve already been naughty and purchase 4 big skirts recently…. You look stunning as always!

  • Angela
    August 7, 2015

    You look absolutely great! That skirt is sooo huge! 🙂 really nice!
    x Angela // missangellane.blogspot.com

  • Alexandra Mayhew
    August 8, 2015

    This is a truly magnificent skirt! Really funny post, I loved it :-)New fan right here! Lexie X

  • char
    August 10, 2015

    Well. I think it’s a beautiful skirt and whilst I hate running, I’d have run for it.

  • Victoria Danaher
    August 16, 2015

    Love this look and that skirt is amazing.

  • Call me M
    August 16, 2015

    Such a beautiful outfit! I laughed so much when I read about the huge parcel. How nice of the runner to give you a compliment (twice!).
    I have the “same” skirt from another site. It’s quite big too, I agree! But what surprised me was its quality. I really loved it! Can’t wait to wear it again! 🙂

  • Mariana
    October 19, 2015

    You look amazing on this skirt, I have being reading your blog for a while, I really enjoy it, but im quiet disappointed since I did some research about the website where you got this skirt “Choies.com” and It seems is a fake clothes chinese website, that pays to bloggers to talk about its products, the clothes look amazing on the bloggers but when you buy there you receive horrible cheap and bad made clothes with impossible sizes. I understand that you need to live from your blog and that is common to receive some products or money from brands or websites to talk about them but I never thought you would recommend a website that is a fraud… because your are also hurting your readers

    • Amber
      October 19, 2015

      Mariana, first of all, you do realise that what you’re accusing me of here is not just ‘hurting my readers’, but also committing serious fraud? And that I could go to jail if that was true? I’m incredibly upset that someone claiming to be a longtime reader would make an accusation like this in such a cavalier fashion, especially one founded on nothing more than something you’ve read on the internet. I really hope you think about the damage you could cause someone by throwing around accusations like that: to say that I’m knowingly breaking the law in order to mislead my readers is really upsetting, and could have very serious consequences for me, so it’s a shame that having apparently enjoyed my blog for a while, you would decide to libel me with your first comment.

      To answer the accusation itself:

      – Choies is “a fake clothes Chinese website”
      You are correct that Choies is a Chinese website, but I can assure you that these are real clothes: the skirt I’m wearing here is the same skirt anyone who orders from their website will receive. I ordered it from their website myself, and yes, I used store credit, but I went through exactly the same process as any other customer, and received the same clothes anyone else would. It is a genuine website, selling real clothes.

      – “that pays bloggers to talk about their clothes”

      I was not paid to talk about this skirt, and have never been paid by Choies to feature their clothes. I received a $20 skirt, which I genuinely like and wear often. I would not commit fraud and risk going to jail over a $20 skirt. (I mean, I wouldn’t do it for money either, but if it wasn’t so serious it would be laughable that you’d accuse me of risking my entire career and livelihood just to get a free $20 skirt…)

      the clothes look amazing on the bloggers but when you buy there you receive horrible cheap and bad made clothes…

      Again, when you buy from this website you will receive exactly the same clothes a blogger would receive. I know people who are not bloggers who have ordered from them, and they have received exactly the same clothes I did. You seem to be implying that Choies send one thing to bloggers, and another to customers, but that is just not true (and, FYI, could be considered libellous, as could your accusation of me comitting fraud…) I have personally never had an issue with the quality of the clothes, and while I’m sure you will find people who HAVE has issues, you’ll find people who’ve had bad experiences with every brand. I have received much more expensive clothing from other brands which I have declined to feature because I’ve been unhappy with the quality: I do not, and never will feature clothes I don’t wear, just because they were free. What would be the point? “I’ll write about clothes I don’t wear, just so I can get more clothes I won’t wear?”

      – they make clothes with “impossible sizes”

      Many of Choies clothes come in very limited sizes, or are “one size”, which I understand is frustrating, and means they will unfortunately not fit everyone. The fact that I (and many other people) wear them, however, suggests that the sizes are not “impossible” – they may not fit EVERYONE, but I can’t think of a single brand that DOES make clothes in every possible size: that’s just not realistic. There’s a size chart on each item, so you should be able to work out whether something will fit you before you buy it, but something not fitting you properly is not the same thing as something being “fake”, and again, accusing me of ‘hurting my readers’ just because you think this brand might not fit some of them is honestly ridiculous.

      I never thought you would recommend a website that is a fraud…

      It’s shame that you didn’t ask me about it before accusing me of doing it then. I wouldn’t. I would NEVER do that, and I’m so disappointed that someone who has been reading my website for any length of time would think THAT’S the kind of person I am, and would rush to accuse me of fraud without even bothering to check the facts first.

      I realise this is a very long comment, but as I said, this is a really serious allegation to make about someone, and I want to make it very clear to my other readers that I’m in no way trying to hurt or mislead them. I’m not claiming Choies is perfect (I have no connection to them other than having occasionally received clothing from them to feature), and by all means, if you have ACTUAL evidence that they’re committing some kind of crime you should take that to the relevant authorities, but I have personally had no issues with the clothes I’ve received from them, and am not being paid to promote them, so it’s an outright lie to suggest otherwise.

#throwbackthursday to the last time I was actually warm 🥶 .
#myunicornlife #lifecolorfully #liveauthentic  #ABMlifeissweet #ABMhappylife #ABMlifeiscolorful #howyouglow #makeyousmilestyle #thegoodlist #thecolorwallproject #colorsplash #colorworld #colorsplurge #lovecolors #jj_colorlove #gf_colour #huntgramcolor #jj_colorful #tv_colors #pocketcolors #sunnypicchallenge #colorhunters #colorgram #colorfulllife #colorinspiration #brightcolors #colormyworld #colorinspiration #womeninframe

#throwbackthursday to the last time...

AD | We’re spending a few days at @highlandheatherlodges in beautiful Perthshire, for what Terry is optimistically referring to as his ‘birthday week’. (I say ‘optimistically’ - we’re only here for three days, and his birthday was yesterday, but don’t stop believing, Terry!)⁣
There’s a hot tub for us and a playpark for Max, so needless to say, we’re having a fantastic time, and I’m already dreading having to leave. Today’s big question: can I pass as an under-12, so I qualify for a pony ride at the nearby wildlife centre? 🤔 (On second thoughts, don’t answer that one...)⁣
#thetraveltag #scotland_ig #visitscotland #scotland_insta #scotlandlife #scottishblogger  #stayandwander #travelbloggerlife #travelblogging #tblogger #thattravelblog #travellifestyle #travelpreneur #perthshire #scotlandinsta #reallifeandstyle #wearingtoday #igstyleblogger #fashiongrammerv

AD | We’re spending a...

AD | Time for a quick game of “Where’s Amber?”⁣
It’s another rainy Monday, so I’m throwing it back to our trip to @universalorlando ‘s amazing Volcano Bay water park last month. I’m a bit of a scaredy when it comes to water flumes, but this park had tons of stuff for pretty much everyone: plenty of rides for me, and an amazing splash pad for Max 👶In fact, I’d still be on The Fearless River right now if I possibly could be. Still, doing the laundry and turning the heating on will be just as good, right? Right?! 🌋 🏊‍♀️ .
#universalorlando #volcanobay #waterpark #lazyriver #vacay #floridavacay

AD | Time for a...

Good news! We took Max to hospital this morning, and saw two different surgeons, who agreed there was no need to go ahead with the surgery as his lip is healing really well on its own 😅  He’ll definitely have a scar, unfortunately, but that would’ve been the case whether he’d had the surgery or not, and if it turns out to be worse than anticipated, we’ll have the option to have it corrected under local anaesthetic when he’s older. ⁣
I’m still really upset that this happened in the first place, obviously, but so relieved that we don’t have to put him through a general anaesthetic, and just incredibly grateful that it wasn’t anything worse. I know some parents have to deal with much more serious stuff than this, and my heart goes out to you all: it’s been a rough couple of days, and I’m really grateful to everyone who took the time to comment on yesterday’s post - your stories were so comforting when I was panicking yesterday ❤️ ⁣
(Old photo, obviously: every time Max sees the selfie camera, he thinks it’s going to be one of those filters where you open your mouth and something happens 😂)⁣
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Good news! We took Max...

Totally unrelated photo, but we’ve just spent the morning in Accident & Emergency with Max, who fell on the path outside the house and split his lip open 😥 ⁣
They tried to stitch it up at A&E, but it was totally impossible with him awake, so they’ve booked him in to have it done under general anaesthetic tomorrow ... Max is absolutely fine: the bleeding stopped quickly, he doesn’t seem to be in pain, and is just his normal, happy little self. I, on the other hand, am a complete wreck: the plastic surgeon he saw today reckons if we don’t have it fixed, his lip will be crooked when it heals, but I’m absolutely *terrified* of the thought of my baby having to have a GA. ⁣
If you’re a long-time follower, you might know that I have a full-blown phobia of general anaesthetic (I literally had an elective c-section in order to eliminate the possibility of an emergency one, which might have had to be done under GA), so I just can’t get my head to accept that it’s safe and he’ll be fine 😥 ⁣
Positive stories and advice very welcome: I’m just so terrified, I can’t even imagine how to get through the next 24 hours 😥😥😥

Totally unrelated photo, but we’ve...

#throwbackthursday to last week, when I needed a sunhat and SPF 50 to leave the house, rather than the current raincoat and wellies situation. Can you tell the post-holiday blues are still in full swing over here? 🌧 .
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#throwbackthursday to last week, when...

The Gelly Sandwich – or How to do gel nails with regular polish
The Biggest Skirt in All the Land