This is your year and it always starts here…
It’s my birthday today. It’s OK, you don’t need to congratulate me, because dudes, I am OLD. And also: grumpy. I am the Grumpy Birthday Girl (TM) – hooray!
See, I’ve never really "got" birthdays. It’s like, "hello, congratulations for still being alive, even although you’re totally decrepit!" I don’t like being reminded that I’m getting older, because seriously, as far as I can tell there’s NOT ONE GOOD THING to be said about aging. Not one. OK, we’ll probably be slightly more financially secure as we age ("Not if you keep on buying shoes," says Terry), but what will we spend it on? Other than botox, obviously? We could spend it on clothes, but where is the joy in buying support stockings and jeans with elasticated waists? And orthopedic shoes? We could spend it on travel, but we’ll probably just complain the whole time about our lumbago, and how we’re not as mobile as we used to be. Gah.
No, I’ll just stay young forever, thanks very much. You can still send me gifts, though, because gifts? Rock. I’ll tell you, there aren’t many days that can’t be improved by getting STUFF, and today was no exception because lookit!
Ipod Nano! In Darth Vader black! What a lovely, generous fiance I have, no? His birthday is in June, and it’s going to be hard for me to top ol’ Vader here, so if you could just drop your suggestions in the comments box, that would be great. (And try to think like a 29-year-old man who likes gadgets and stuff. Thanks.) He also got me these:
Crack in a bag, folks. Nah, I’m just kidding – it’s earplugs. They won’t quite match my orange earphones, but that’s OK because neon is SO this season trust me. It’s great being totally intolerant of noise, you get entire bags of yellow earphones all to yourself. Hee!
So yes, that was my birthday, 2007style. Later I will get dressed and go out to dinner with Terry and my parents, and after that I will drink wine. In the meantime, though, I’m going to get all emo on you and copy paste song lyrics into my blawg. It makes me feel young again, like a MySpace kid or something. Here they are:
Why is it that as we grow older and stronger
The road signs point us adrift and make us afraid
Saying "You never can win," "Watch your back," "Where’s your husband?"
Oh I don’t like the signs that the signmakers made.
So I’m going to steal out with my paint and my brushes
I’ll change the directions, I’ll hit every street
It’s the Tinseltown scandal, the Robin Hood vandal
She goes out and steals the King’s English
And in the morning you wake up and the signs point to you
"I’m so glad that you finally made it here,"
"You thought nobody cared, but I did, I could tell,"
And "This is your year," and "It always starts here,"
And oh-oh oh-oh-oh oh-oh, "You’re aging well."