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The Reality of Working from Home With a Baby

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his January, for the first time in as long as I can remember, I’m starting the new year without a fancy new planner, a pile of fresh notebooks, and a long list of goals.

It’s not because I don’t want any of those things, I hasten to add. Don’t worry, this isn’t going to be one of those sanctimonious “new mum” posts about how I finally have my priorities straight, and, why, I just don’t know what I used to do with my time before I had a baby! Because, the fact is, I know EXACTLY what I used to do with my time before I had a baby.

I worked. I read. I went running in the middle of the day. I had guilt-free showers. I slept for as long as I wanted to. I shopped. I washed my hair every single day. I planned my outfits in advance. I spent time with friends and family. I kept up with current events. I cleaned my house, and organised things exactly how I wanted them. I spent a lot of time mindlessly scrolling through Instagram on my phone, but it was OK, because I had all the time in the world, and it was technically part of my job. I had days out, and didn’t have to plan them around someone else’s nap time. I did all of these things, and more.

But mostly, I worked.

The reality of self-employment, you see, is that you spend most of your time working: partly through necessity (When you’re a one-man band, there’s literally no end to the work that needs to be done, because there’s no one there to step in and take over…),but also because I enjoyed it. And, honestly, there was a time many years ago, back when I was in regular employment, and hating every second of it, when I wouldn’t even have believed that was possible. I didn’t think I could ever actually LIKE working: but then I discovered blogging, and finally I had a job I didn’t just do because I HAD to, but also because I WANTED to. It was like some kind of miracle, really.

And so, every January, I’d start the year by sitting down with my newest notebook (Er, once I’d photographed it for Instagram, obviously…) and start planning out my year. Now, I’ve never really been one for New Year’s resolutions, but I am very goal-orientated, and, when it comes to work, I’ve always liked to set various targets throughout the year, and then try to beat them. It’s one of the ways I motivate myself, and I actually really enjoy it: and, of course, every year there’s that spark of hope that maybe THIS will be the year I smash all of my targets and end up making my fortune. Well, a girl can dream, right?

But this year has been different.

This year, I waited until the January sales to buy myself a new planner, having learned my lesson from the fact that last year’s diary remained largely un-opened, with all of the goals and targets it contained well and truly un-met. In fact, by around about March, I’d stopped even bothering to look at my blog’s analytics – partly because I was too scared to, and partly because I knew that, realistically, there wasn’t really much I could do to change them, anyway.

It was our first year of parenthood, and the worst year I’ve had as a blogger in a really long time. And, of course, this wasn’t remotely surprising to me, really. I mean, I’m not stupid: I knew the switch to mostly parenting-related topics would alienate readers who weren’t interested in parenting, and that I’d lose followers because of it. I also knew that I’d be unlikely to be able to post as often as I did pre-baby, and that, as much as I wanted to continue to do things like outfit posts, I might not be able to find the time for them with a baby to look after. I knew all of this, and I was OK with it, thinking that it would just be for a few months, and then I’d slowly be able to get back on track.

Honestly, though?

I’m still waiting for things to get even CLOSE to being “back on track.”

And, the truth is that it’s now one year later, and things aren’t getting any easier: in fact, if anything, it’s only getting harder as time goes on, because, the older and more active Max gets, the more of my time and energy he takes up. He’s never been the kind of baby who’s content to just sit and play with a toy: he wants you to play with him, and he requires – and deserves – my full attention, 100% of the time. And that, of course, makes working from home downright impossible. Yes, even when your work is “just” blogging. And, yes, even when your partner works at home too.

the reality of working from home with a baby or toddlerI know quite a few of you will probably be rolling your eyes at this post: I actually hesitated to post it, for that very reason. I mean, when I was pregnant with Max, people kept telling Terry and I how lucky we were to both work from home, and how much easier it would make it to look after the baby, and, of course, there’s a lot of truth in that. We ARE lucky to be able to both be at home with our baby, 24/7, and we don’t for a second take that for granted, trust me. At the same time, though, it has to be said that there’s a huge difference between simply BEING at home and WORKING from home, and trying to reconcile the two has been the biggest challenge of the last year, by far.

In Terry’s case, it’s been particularly difficult, because his work (Web design) is client-based, which means he has deadlines and meetings and phone-calls to deal with all day long: so, the fact that he’s at home doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s free to look after the baby at any given time.

“It’s hard. In fact, some days it’s absolutely impossible.”
For me, my work is obviously much more flexible, but it’s still proven very, very difficult to try to fit it in around childcare. As things stand, Max’s morning nap just gives me time to shower and dress (But not to wash and dry my hair), while his afternoon nap gives me time to eat something, and maybe catch up with a few emails, before he’s awake again. For the rest of the day, Terry and I basically play pass-the-parcel, with one us looking after the baby, while the other one frantically tries to work. My parents also help out a couple of times a week, which is an absolute Godsend for us, but, ultimately we’re still trying to fit a week’s worth of work into just a few hours scattered throughout the week – and to to fit it around all of the usual life-admin stiff that has to be taken care of, too: the dental appointments and haircuts (And, er, eyelash extensions…) and endless loads of laundry, etc. It’s hard. In fact, some days it’s absolutely impossible – and by the time Max is in bed, and I’m sitting down at my desk for the first time that day, knowing that it’s now too dark to take photos for that post I have to write, and that I’m probably just going to have to spend the next couple of hours trying to clear the email backlog anyway, I just want to give up: to admit defeat, and walk away, knowing that I tried my best, but it just wasn’t enough.

I don’t, though. Because, crazy though I know it seems, this blog is my job – and I don’t want to give it up.

So I work in the evenings, and in all of those snatched moments of time when either my parents or Terry are on baby duty, and Terry does the same. In this way, we’ve somehow managed to stay afloat this past year, but that’s pretty much ALL we’ve managed. So, the work gets done, but it always gets done at the last minute, and in a panicked kind of rush: gone are the days when I’d schedule all of my blog posts at least a week in advance, and take high-quality photos to go with each one, for instance – these days posts are frequently published on the same day they’re written, and accompanied by a grainy iPhone photo that has nothing whatsoever to do with the topic of the post. Most of the time, I feel like I’m speed-typing rather than actually writing, and if you’re thinking that all this proves is that it’s totally possible to run a successful blogging business in just a few hours per week, then I will respectfully refer you to my blog stats, which prove that, actually, NO, IT FREAKING ISN’T.

Obviously, you can keep a blog running without putting in too much effort. But you can’t really hope to keep it growing, which is why 2018 was very much a year of treading water for Terry and I – and 2019 will probably be the same.

We’ve somehow managed to keep afloat despite all of the challenges, and I guess that’s a small victory in itself, but it’s still not exactly ideal, and, I have to admit, I really miss being able to work in the same way I used to: to getting stuck into new projects, and trying to meet new goals. I feel like all around me right now, people are declaring that 2019 is going to be their Best! Year! Ever!, while listing all of the exciting plans they have for the next 12 months, and here I am, still just treading water, and hoping that the opportunities I’m having to turn down right now, because I just don’t have time for them, will still be there when I finally get back on my feet – whenever that may be.

(Probably not until Max goes to nursery, to be honest. And yes, I know that sending him early is an option that would certainly give Terry and I more time for work, but we just don’t quite feel ready for that yet. I’m not saying we won’t change our minds, obviously, but for now at least, we’d rather keep him home with us, while we can…)

And, I mean, it’s not ALL doom and gloom, obviously. While I haven’t set any specific goals for 2019, that doesn’t mean there isn’t anything to look forward to. We have a holiday booked for May, for instance, and are hoping to fit in at least one more foreign holiday this year, as well as another trip to Kent, which we’d like to make an annual thing, if at all possible. Our biggest aim – for life in general, not just for 2019 – is to be able to travel more, especially over the next few years, when we’re not restricted to school holidays, and we’ve been talking a lot about ways to potentially make that happen. The main thing here, we think, is to figure out ways to work smarter, rather than harder, and to try to create income streams that aren’t reliant on me taking on sponsored posts, or Terry taking on new clients. (Hey, anyone want to buy my book? Or this very short, and slightly random book on press releases, which came out last week? Anyone?) We do have some ideas to that end, which we just need some time to make happen: and, yes, I am very aware of the irony of saying I need more time, right at the end of a 2,000 word blog post about how I don’t have time to write blog posts. To misquote Oscar Wilde, though, please excuse the length of this post: I didn’t have time to write a shorter one…

And, on that note, Max is just about to get up from his nap, so all of those plans and ideas will have to wait until he’s back in bed. Wish me luck…

The reality of working from home when you have a baby

The reality of working from home when you have a baby

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37 Comments
  • Emer Broderick
    January 7, 2019

    Really enjoy your blog posts- I have a 10 month old and completely understand where you’re coming from with the work/mama balance. I found your post on having a c section last year so helpful as o was heading in to have mine a few months later. Also love your style so keep both the Max and outfit posts coming 😃

  • Katie Writes Stuff
    January 7, 2019

    I’m not a parent and I originally started reading your blog because of your outfit posts – and I keep reading because I enjoy your writing style and your sense of humour. Despite the fact that I’m not a parent, I’m constantly amazed that you manage to keep posting such enjoyable content despite the demands on your time. I hope you are able to keep going because I am looking forward to reading more of your adventures.

  • Alice
    January 7, 2019

    Not sure who thinks you have it easy, I think it’s virtually impossible to work with a child at home (beyond the first month or so when they sleep a lot). When are you planning to send him to nursery?

    • Amber
      January 7, 2019

      We’re not sure!

  • Suzanne Tam
    January 7, 2019

    Not being a parent, I initially thought I might not read as many of your blogs after Max (sorry, Max; I mean you no harm…), but, it turns out, I like the parenting posts as much as I like your non-parenting stuff. Who knew? I LOVE the fact that you’re not all ‘this is perfect’ and telling people what they should be doing to raise their kids. Your honesty is very refreshing.

  • Melissa
    January 7, 2019

    I’m a new reader since your pregnancy. Drawn in by your tokophobia and how you coped with pregnancy and a baby. I was aware of your blog previously, but only read it occasionally. Now I read almost every post when they pop up. Hopefully you’ll continue to draw new readers to replace the ones you’ve lost.

  • Rosie von Waldherr
    January 7, 2019

    I totally understand you! Benjamin is a very active baby too and even though he doesn’t actually WANT me to play with him, he wants me to sit on the floor next to him and watch him play. It is absolutely impossible to do anything on the blog when he’s awake. And now he’s ready to down to only one nap, that’s been fun. Maybe you can put him in daycare for just one day a week or two mornings/afternoons per week? That way the transition would be smoother for everyone and you would be able to get more done. Although I have to admit I do love your blog as it is now! <3

    xo, Rosie //Curvy Life stories

  • Jill www.stylishatsixty.wordpress.com
    January 7, 2019

    Life will never be normal again! – well not for many years. Both of you will learn and grow with your families support.
    Love reading your posts. Carry on with the good work. You make a fabulous mummy x

  • Linda Libra Loca
    January 7, 2019

    I only discovered you last year, so I never got to see the “before”, but as a fellow mom I have to tell you that you are doing an amazing job! I am very lucky that I have a day job I love that pays the bills, so the blog is solely a hobby, but even with a glimpse on what that actually takes I couldn´t imagine keeping one afloat with a little kid.

    Anne| Linda, Libra, Loca

  • Deanna
    January 7, 2019

    Your blog post reminded me of my days as a young mom, and how hard it was to get anything done! There would be days I’d open the microwave to start dinner, and find my lunch in there still (that I had forgotten to eat). Now I’m an empty-nester and am trying to figure out how to structure my empty days which is a different kind of challenge. I have a friend who works from home, and she hires a nanny to come into her home a couple of days a week so she can plan some uninterrupted work time, but still sneak downstairs for a cuddle whenever she wants a break 🙂 Hang in there and I love hearing about your parenting adventures!

  • Myra
    January 7, 2019

    You’re doing a great job, and I agree your parent g posts are well worth reading. Your honest view of life along with your sense of humour will keep your followers reading. I think it’s a good idea to get a nanny in a couple of days a week to look after Max and you will still be able to see him during the day when you have a break.

    • Amber
      January 7, 2019

      We just can’t afford anything like that, unfortunately – nannies are quite expensive here!

  • Anneke Caramin
    January 7, 2019

    I’ve been reading your blog for years now, even though our styles/lives/interests are miles apart. I don’t have children and don’t plan on having any, but I still kept reading after Max was born, simply because I enjoy your writing and the way you talk about life, even if it doesn’t have anything to do with mine. I’m sure you guys will find a way to cope with the situation and find a way to make it work! And don’t listen to people saying you have it easy because you work from home, that’s completely ridiculous. Take care x

  • Erin
    January 7, 2019

    I feel weird responding to this because I don’t “know” you or “know” your exact situation but I wanted to chime in with my thoughts (as a non-parent. Parents love that, right?). My best friend has two lovely boys and works full time at home as an HR manager. So more like Terry’s job in relation to commitments/meetings/schedules. She was really torn about daycare, parenting, nannies, etc, but she has a great job that pays well and she likes (not sure if she likes it as much as you like blogging, but she does like it) and she didn’t want to leave even though she knew she wanted to be a mom. After she had her first son, she wasn’t entitled to a real maternity leave (cuz, Murica’) so she took 8 weeks off at half pay and went back. At first, she spent a few months trying to just work at home while her newborn napped. She quickly realized she would need care, so she hired a nanny to come to the house because she didn’t want to send her son to a daycare. To make it cost effective, she hired a nanny that had her own children and could bring them with her while she watched my friend’s baby. Because nannies are prohibitively expensive, while at the same time working in childcare pays a pittance so you could never afford to work in childcare while paying for your own child to be in childcare, this worked out well for about a year. Afterwards, she had to move and there was a string of similar nannies with their own kid/s who never really stuck, and eventually when her son was around two she put her son in full care, had another child and he moved to full care once her maternity leave ended. Between these times when she tried to go without a nanny or care, or even when her kids were in the house with a nanny, she never got any work done. Even with the nanny, her first son was still downstairs in her home and she knew it and would go to see him all the time because that’s what you do. Anyways, what I’m trying to illustrate here is less a suggestion, but more the quick realization that you can’t actually “work at home” when you have a child there. It’s tantamount to impossible. You are not alone. My only real suggestion if you want to try to grow the blog or work on it more (without worrying about making it a resolution), is to see if your parents could do scheduled care for two full days a week. That full 8 hours may allow you and Terry time to stack those two days with photos, catching up, meetings, scheduling posts in advance, etc. so you’re able to do more posts. I selfishly miss your more frequent posts, but it only makes the new ones more exciting 🙂 I don’t know if both of your parents still work, so this may be a complete non-option, but if it is and you could live with being without Max for two days (he’s so adorable, I probably couldn’t!) it may be easier to work on a routine. I’m a super disorganized person so I’m sure you’ve though of or may even be operating on a system similar to this, so sorry if this is a dumb post. Even though I’m not a parent, I work at home and I know how people don’t think it’s a real job. People just expect me to always be available because I work at home, like I just get paid for doing nothing all day. That’s not how any of this works!

  • Linda
    January 8, 2019

    You only get ONE time to experience each of these firsts with Max. Regardless of what you choose to do with your time related to your blog, Max will keep growing. He will live and learn primarily from you and your husband – or from someone else during the formative years. A while back when vacationing in the UK in the Lake District my husband and I met a couple at the lovely B&B where we stayed. He was a barrister and she was a designer for Laura Ashley. She told me that she hired a nanny to keep her baby while she worked during the day with her high paying dream designer job. She came home one day and the toddler took a tumble and fell just before the Nanny left to go home. Mommy rushed to pick her up and baby turned away from Mommy and ran to Nanny for comfort. The next day Mommy resigned and opened her own design business working from home. Do not stress over the numbers that tell you how many ‘other people’ read your content, follow you, etc. Relish instead that Max is growing increasingly attached to Mommy and Daddy. That attachment can only happen one time in a child’s life while his personality is being formed from 0-6 years of age. It’s permanently set by age 6 and you have the wonderful privilege of influencing his personality. At the end of Max’s years at home, you will be so glad you chose to prioritize him over career. It’s a lifetime relationship.

    • Amber
      January 8, 2019

      I’m not “stressing over numbers” or “prioritising career” as a vanity thing, thing, though – it’s my livelihood, and being able to feed, clothe and keep a roof over Max’s head also has to be a priority for us. Not everyone has the luxury of just not having to think about work, unfortunately: it’s very easy to tell people to just forget about their careers and to focus on their family instead, but unless you’re independently wealthy, it’s just not realistic – I have to work, and that means I have to “stress about numbers”, or by the time Max is 6, he’ll won’t have a home to live in, it’s as simple as that.

      • Linda
        January 9, 2019

        I didn’t clearly communicate b/c I was not suggesting you quit blogging. I wanted to affirm that the time you spend with Max especially in those 1st 6 formative years you will not regret, even if it means making some adjustments in your business goals. May e hiring a VA or having someone come in two days a week to watch Max will be enough adjustment. Sometimes a small tweak reaps a bigger result than we imagined. I also would like to comment as a new reader that you stand above most fashion bloggers. You are unique. Even if you had to cut back on the length of your blogs or the frequency of your blogs, you have a plethera of depth and breadth of content to keep readers coming back. I have referred many of my clients and retailers to your blog. By not ‘stressing’ over the numbers I did not mean to imply quit or don’t get a plan in place. I would be very disappointed if you quit blogging – and I never meant to imply that. The vulnerability in which you blog about working with baby in tow and trips with baby in tow is refreshing. Thank you for posting from with reality from your heart. Cheers to your adorable family and happy new year.

        • Amber
          January 10, 2019

          Thanks for your kind words, Linda, I really appreciate them 🙂

    • Alice
      January 8, 2019

      Sorry but this is just nonsense. Of course it is Amber and Terry’s personal decision whether to put Max in paid childcare or not, but there is no evidence whatsoever that being in childcare harms children or stops them loving their mothers. From personal experience I can assure you that my daughter turns to me first even though she has been in (excellent) childcare since she was 11 months old. And data also backs this up.

      I actually think it is very sexist to imply that women shouldn’t work and should instead be at home with children (and also contributes to the gender pay gap). Or do you think the father should have resigned his job too? In many countries (eg France) it is normal for children to go to a local council creche from a few months old, as maternity leave is shorter – they still love their parents!

      On a practical level I would suggest considering a part time childminder (a lot cheaper than a nanny – and if he is in your house with a nanny you will still find it hard to work) – you will find it amazing how much you can get done in one child free day – but obviously that’s your personal decision.

      • Amber
        January 8, 2019

        Totally agree: and it honestly makes me sad that women are encouraged to feel that they’re somehow letting their children down by working to provide for them (or even just because they want to continue to have a career). I also don’t really understand how, in the example given, the mother quitting her job to run a business from home would’ve helped, anyway: the whole point of my post was that working from home is still working, and it’s impossible to do it while looking after a child. Reading between the lines, I suspect that “working from home” is just not taken seriously by some: I’d be interested to know if I’d still be being encouraged to view my career as disposable if I worked outside the home, or did something other than blogging?

      • Alice
        January 9, 2019

        And actually thinking more about this…..I’d be delighted to see my daughter run to her nanny or other carer if upset. That would give me confidence that she was happy in childcare – I wouldn’t want her to be constantly pining for her mother.

        My daughter loves me, her father, my parents, the manager of her nursery, her nanny, her nanny’s daughter – I think this is great that she has so many people she can turn to for support. I don’t think it would be right for me to want her only ever to turn to me.

        The implication of the initial comment really is that childcare is only OK if your child is unhappy there!!!!!

        • Katharine
          January 11, 2019

          Yes, THIS!! My mother-in-law used to come watch my son two days every week, and my husband and I would joke that she was his favorite parent because he would always choose her over us when she was around and he was upset. And we loved it! Seeing that relationship between then was so special and heartwarming. Now he’s in part-time childcare and adores his teachers. And we love that too. Knowing he has a whole community of wonderful people to care for him and love him in addition to his parents is wonderful.

  • Alice
    January 8, 2019

    I actually think you would be. Plenty of dinosaurs about who still believe mothers shouldn’t work at all. Conveniently forgetting that apart from using our education, gaining fulfillment, etc, some of us also have bills to pay and don’t want to live off a man!

  • sophikita
    January 8, 2019

    I’m still reading! And adding another voice to the chorus that it’s complexly impossible to work when you also have a child at home! Good luck x

  • CiCi Marie
    January 8, 2019

    Well, I’m on maternity leave so I’m being paid not to have to worry about work for a year, and I STILL can’t get a blog post together with a 5 month old for the life of me. To try to get one in the bank takes a week of forward planning and a military operation on the day/s photos and writing need to take place. Luckily, it’s not my job so when my stats tanked nothing was riding on it, but frankly I’m amazed you manage to post anything at all!!

    • Amber
      January 8, 2019

      And it’s not just blogging, either – EVERYTHING takes so much planning! It’s actually one of the hardest things about parenting, I think: the fact that even silly little things that you previously didn’t have to think twice about now (Like washing your hair, say, or changing the bedsheets…) now have to be scheduled into the diary – so frustrating!

  • Alessandra
    January 8, 2019

    I think it is a way that you write not what you write about that I love 😍😍😍 good luck with Max I’m sure with time you will find some innovative ways of working 😀 and of course once he gets older he can be your first employee 😉

  • Amanda
    January 9, 2019

    I love your blog and only discovered it around the time you have Max. I completely agree that working from home with children is impossible whatever job you do. After my first child I went back to work 3.5 days but compressed it into 3 days and my son went to nursery. The option to work from home one of those days became available and I loved it as it saved on the commute, I scheduled deliveries for that day and my coffee was better than the office! But there is no way I could have got anything done with my son at home and my extra 0.5 days was done as emails in the evenings. On the days I wasn’t at work I still found it hard to get house stuff and life admin done with him around. I’m always hesitant to give advice as what works for one doesn’t for another and you may not want it but I think over time you develop a series of tricks or life hacks that work for you. So for me I showered at night until he was old enough to be left on his own. I prepped my food and ate with him to save time. I also discovered that whilst my son liked playing with me he was also just happy being and interacting with me so I saved jobs like laundry and cleaning and going to shops for when he was awake and from about 1/1.5 he just liked “helping” or doing stuff along side me. Then as soon as he napped I was regimented in not getting distracted turning on lap top / phone and doing life admin/jobs I couldn’t do with him awake! It definitely got easier as he got older too.

  • Bry Jaimea
    January 10, 2019

    Thanks so much for sharing this Amber!

  • Nellie
    January 11, 2019

    I really appreciated this post, and I love how you have chosen to be an attentive parent. Those early years can be so draining, but they are so fleeting. What a valuable foundation you are giving to Max and that is going to carry him far in life. I applaud your efforts and still love reading your blog. I don’t mind the change in focus because that’s life.

  • Katharine
    January 11, 2019

    I definitely sympathize with this! As a self-employed writer, people often tell me how nice it must be to work and be home with my toddler at the same time. And then I tell them, no, those things ABSOLUTELY do not happen at the same time! Work and childcare, especially with young children, both need 100% of your attention, or it’s not fair to either.

    Our currently solution is 3 days of daycare a week, 2 days when I’m home with him and not trying to work at all. Last year, my mother in law and husband would alternate days watching him while I went to a coffee shop to work. It’s a constant juggle, and what we can afford/what’s available for childcare has changed yearly. But anyone who tells you that you can just “squeeze work into naptime and when they’re playing” is so, so wrong.

    Good luck finding your feet! It takes time and constant re-evaluation, but it IS possible!

  • Wave to Mummy
    January 13, 2019

    Oh it is such a pain trying to work from home with kids – I really can’t do any blogging anymore and I do occasionally work from home with my real job too, and I can’t do anything outside the school hours… It is tough. It does get better if/when they go to nursery, and when they go to school, and after they are 5 they start to entertain themselves a bit. But the struggle is real, good luck!

  • Jo
    January 13, 2019

    I am a translator and I have worked from home for almost 20 years, and now have 2 children (4 and 7). I used to read your blog years ago, and came across a picture of you on Pinterest today, which reminded me about you and here you are, a mum too! Congratulations!

    I empathise entirely. It’s HARD. My boys were similar to yours, I had to give them attention ALL OF THE TIME and they stopped having 2 naps a day early on. It was impossible to work. I ended up putting both boys into nursery. My youngest went into nursery for a total of 2 days a week, spread out over the week, from the age of 6 months. Looking back, he was tiny, but I had to do it to keep my business going. I don’t regret it, I was able to work – and I really needed the mental stimulus of working, because of course I adore my children but I also had a brain that needed to keep thinking and working – and they also got to see other kids and learn different people and different ways of doing things. Nursery taught them lots of things that I would never even think of, like what it feels like to play with a huge pan full of chopped up tomatoes (someone had a glut from the summer – random!) It becomes easier when they are 3 because you get 15 hours of childcare paid for.

    Fast track to now and, from September, both boys will be in school. School hours and holidays bring a whole different issue with them, your day is cut into two, right in the middle of the afternoon when you finally have a chance to work after cleaning up the house after breakfast, putting washing on, going shopping, etc. School holidays are difficult, any work has to be done in the evenings. The boys still don’t entertain themselves, so I can’t work when they come home from school. So work days are split into two – between 10 and 2pm, then from 8pm until whenever the work is done. That could be 1am, 2am or even later, just to meet my deadline.

    But you know what? I wouldn’t change it. Yes, I’m exhausted and a bit behind on the housework and cleaning and ironing (but not washing, I can throw that in the machine easily enough!). But I’m also there whenever the boys need me – before and after school/nursery, dinner time, bedtime. If they are sick in school or if they have a class assembly and you’re invited to come and watch. The times that matter. And that’s what matters. That’s ALL that matters.

    Good luck!

  • Morgan Shaw
    January 17, 2019

    Hello Amber , I am severely dyslexic but thought I would try giving your book a read and finished and really enjoyed it. It felt almost like I could imagine you saying those things ! I am so sorry to hear about what happened to your husband and glad he is now on the mend. I doubt I will monetise my blog because I am chronically ill with multiple illnesses, but I like to use it to raise awareness, but there was some useful social media and seo tips and was interesting to read about your journey and how you to into full- time blogging and made money from it . I laughed at the bit when you got offered collaborations for incontinence pads and men steel toe boots. Morgan

    • Amber
      January 18, 2019

      Thank you so much, I’m really glad you liked it!

  • MotherGeek
    May 8, 2019

    You sound exactly like me from my kids being born until they were both in school full time. Honestly: I think it’s impossible unless you have childcare. Let’s be honest, you wouldn’t expect to get any work done if you took them to a normal 9-5 job, so why should working from home be any different?

  • Myra
    May 16, 2019

    You are doing as well as you can. Max needs you now and you are giving him all you can. Things will get better as he gets older, and before you know it, you will be longing for this time back again. Nobody ever looks back on their life and wishes they had spent more time working. It’s OK to tread water for a couple of years, your priorities have changed. Keep on doing what you’re doing.

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