Pregnancy Diary | Week 16 | Gas or baby, baby or gas?
MY WEEK 16 PREGNANCY DIARY
So, the theme for this week is “there is no theme for this week”. GOD.
Yup, it seems that week 15 flowed easily into week 16, the way weeks tend to do, and there’s basically nothing much to tell me I’m pregnant right now: well, other than the giant bump that used be my midriff, obviously. Which means that, actually, I guess there IS a theme for this week after all: the theme is, “WHY THE HELL CAN’T I FEEL MOVEMENT YET, SERIOUSLY, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?”
Now, I know what you’re all going to say: the average time for women feeling movement is 17 – 21 weeks, and lots and lots of people have told me that I’m totally average in this respect, and that they didn’t feel movement at 16 weeks either. For every person who tells me that, though, there’s been at least 5 other people who could feel their babies blink right from the moment of conception, and WAH, why can’t that be meeeeee? Because I don’t WANT to be “average” right now: “average” is scaring the crap out of me, and making me worry, and then worry some more, and, actually, I would quite like to be an over-achiever in this respect, thanks. Why can’t I do that?
The main consequence of this uncertainty is a whole lot of anxiety, obviously. Seriously, if you were to look at my Google searches this week, they would look a bit like this:
“IS IT A BABY OR IS IT JUST GAS?”
“SERIOUSLY, BABY OR GAS????”
“MOVEMENTS AT 16 WEEKS: DOES IT FEEL LIKE GAS?”
“PICTURES OF ‘DOODLE’ PUPPIES”
“PEOPLE WHO DIDN’T FEEL BABY MOVE AT 16 WEEKS BUT EVERYTHING TURNED OUT TO BE TOTALLY OK”
“PUPPIES AND BABIES: REALLY GREAT IDEA”
“I THINK IT’S JUST GAS, BUT COULD IT ACTUALLY BE BABY?”
“CAN I JUST BUY THAT ZARA SKIRT ONE SIZE UP AND IT WILL FIT ME AT 16 WEEKS PREGNANT BUT STILL FIT ME AFTER THE BABY IS BORN?”
“BABIES AND GAS VIRTUALLY INDISTINGUISHABLE REALLY”
“HOW TO STOP YOUR FEET GROWING DURING PREGNANCY”
“PREGNANCY WEEK 16 STILL NO MOVEMENT TOTALLY NORMAL, SERIOUSLY”
“HOW TO AFFORD REPLACING ALL MY SHOES IF MY FEET GROW LIKE EVERYONE SAYS THEY WILL”
“PEOPLE WHO WERE TOTALLY SURE IT WAS JUST GAS, BUT IT WAS REALLY THE BABY”
(It was gas, btw. Don’t ask me how I know…)
So, yeah, week 16 has seen a bit of an uptick in anxiety, and it’s mostly due to the lack of reassurance that there’s actually anything going on in there. Luckily I have my next midwife appointment next week, so I’m hoping she’ll be able to listen to the heartbeat and give me at least some reassurance then (We’ve used the home doppler a few times, and have always managed to find the heartbeat on that, but all of the scare stories I was sent when I first posted about it have terrified the life out of me, unfortunately…): other than that, it’s just a countdown to the 20-week scan, which, in their infinite wisdom, our hospital have booked in for 21 weeks. They also booked my 12 week scan in for 13 weeks, and my 16 week midwife appointment for 18 weeks, so I feel a bit like they’re just trying to taunt me now, and that, as soon as I get close to one of those milestones I’ve been chasing, they’re just going to keep on moving it a little further away. We DID manage to get the 12 week scan moved forward, though, so I’m hoping we can do the same with the 20 week one, but… yeah, not going to hold my breath, really.
WEEK 16 PREGNANCY DIARY
Week 16 Pregnancy Symptoms
EATING ALL THE THINGS. It’s strange, actually, because most of the time I’d say I don’t really have much of an appetite, and I never really seem to feel hungry, as such, but then, as soon as I start eating, it’s like the floodgates open and I can’t seem to stop myself, until I’ve eaten half the house. This is actually worrying me a bit: not in a health-anxiety kind of way, just in a “wow, I’m going to be absolutely HUGE by the end of this, aren’t I?” kind of way. I know you’re not supposed to say that, because wanting to keep your figure is silly and frivolous, and all that, but, well, I guess I AM silly and frivolous: WHO KNEW?
Still, I have to admit (and feel free to follow me through the streets, ringing a bell and shouting, “SHAME! SHAME!” at this point…), although I’ve been eating a lot, I haven’t been eating particularly healthily. This is honestly (HONESTLY) not like me, because Terry and I are usually pretty good at sticking to a balanced diet, but, as I mentioned, Terry’s mum started chemo last week, and although the first few days went pretty smoothly, that turned out to just be the universe taking the piss, and the rest of the week was pretty damn rough: for her especially, obviously, but I can’t even tell you (And sadly, I know I don’t even need to, because so many of you have been through this, too) how hard it is to watch someone you love going through this. We’ve been doing our best to be there for her as much as possible, because that’s really all we can do, and that’s meant we’ve been relying on fast food much more than we usually would. I keep telling myself I’ll totally manage to resit it, but then someone produces a bucket of KFC, and before I know what happened, I’m wearing it like a nosebag, and… yeah, I’ll just start handing out a free “SHAME!” bell to each new newsletter subscriber, shall I?
I will do better this week, I swear. All being well, we’ll (hopefully) be eating at home most of the week, so that should help: just, no one say the words, “Egg McMuffin” to me, OK?
Week 16 pregnancy aversions
Still coffee, I’m afraid. Sorry, coffee: I love you so much, but I just can’t be around you right now. It’s not you, it’s me, I promise… Maybe we can catch up again in January?
Week 16 pregnancy cravings
Steak pie. Which I wasn’t even thinking about until someone happened to mention it to me, and then it was all I could think about. We were going to go out and get some that day, but something else came up: luckily, the very next day, we came home to find that a steak pie had mysteriously appeared in the fridge – thanks, mum and dad!
Week 16 pregnancy fears (other than the obvious)
SLEEPING POSITIONS. I KNOW. Who the hell is scared of SLEEPING POSITIONS? Er, this girl, that’s who: ever since she read that she’s only “allowed” to sleep on her left side, and never, ever on her back, otherwise the baby will die. SOOOO reassuring, no?
When I first read this, I actually felt quite smug, because I’d finally – FINALLY – found something I could DO. I mean, I sleep on my left side anyway, always have, so I’d be able to just keep on doing what I’d always done, AND get Brownie points for it: I WIN AT PREGNANCY! Or, well, at this particular aspect of it, anyway. Of course, what I was totally forgetting here was that aspect of my personality which dictates that as soon as someone tells me I HAVE to do something, I immediately want to do the complete opposite. So, pretty much the second I read the whole “left side only” thing, I immediately wanted to sleep on my right side, but only when I’m not sleeping on my back, which is what I really, REALLY want. And, I mean, lord knows, I’ve spent YEARS trying to teach to myself to sleep on my back, purely to avoid those annoying sleep lines that I’ve been a martyr to for year nows. Nope, couldn’t do it: until it became absolutely essential that I NOT do it, and now, God, it’s just so damn comfy, WAH.
So, I’ve obviously been trying my very best NOT to sleep on my back, obviously, because although the study that all of this scaremongering comes from doesn’t seem particularly conclusive, I am very, very susceptible to scaremongering, and I’ve been well and truly mongered with this one. So every night, I dutifully lie on my left hand side, even although every nerve in my body is screaming, “RIGHT SIDE! RIGHT SIDE!” and then, what happens? Well, yesterday morning, I woke up flat on my back, with no memory of how I got there. After a quick freak-out, I rolled onto my left… and then woke up for the second time, a while later, happily curled up on my right. And now I feel like the worst person ever, because seriously, Amber, how hard can it be?
Anyway, I’ve given it a bit of thought, and the only solution I can come up with is to buy one of those weird body pillows pregnant women seem to love so much. I don’t really want to get one of these, though, partly because I don’t actually have any discomfort when I’m sleeping (YET), but mostly because they look huge, and I can’t imagine how one would actually fit into our small double bed, without Terry having to vacate it first. Still, I guess if it stops me constantly rolling onto my back, it might be the only option, so BRB, just off looking at kingsize beds…
MY PREGNANCY DIARY
Myra Boyle
I laughed so much at this post, particularly the sleep positions. We move dozens of times a night and continue to do that right through pregnancy. It only gets difficult as your body and baby gets bigger, and that’s when the pillow really helps to support your top leg when lying on whatever side you prefer. A normal pillow will do – it’s not a Terry body size replacement lol.
Your body will tell you what you need to eat, so if your normal diet is allegedly healthy, your body is telling you you need something else, some other nutrient (I quite fancy steak pie myself now lol).
My feet didn’t get bigger after pregnancy, and my feet only got bigger when I put on weight as I aged, so I doubt yours will either. Did your mum’s get bigger, that will be a good guide.
You look fabulous by the way, loving this outfit.
Amber
Nope, my mum is absolutely mystified by all of the things people keep telling me will definitely happen to me – she just keeps saying that it wasn’t like that for her, or any of the people she knows who were pregnant at the same time!
Becky
Hey Amber, if you don’t want to get the pregnancy pillow yet (my mum has one for a bad back and has just lent it to me and the damn thing is huge) then just get an extra normal pillow and wedge it under your back and hip. It stops you from rolling completely over, which is apparently a good thing. I’m not sure how much I believe in the whole ‘only sleep on your left hand side’ as I’m pretty sure women have been sleeping for centuries any way they please (possibly even like bats for some of them) and there is still a rather large human race on the planet, but equally I’ve been google conned into trying it. It is actually on my list of questions to ask at the next midwife appointment in 2 weeks time! I normally sleep on my back and I’m finding the side sleeping really uncomfortable and actually a bit painful, but the pillow under the back has helped loads more than the full body sleep pillow or the pillow between the legs trick which I also tried. Give it a go and see what happens before you commit to the full body. I’m still expecting I will need that in about 2 months time, but frankly I’m delaying it as much as possible! Becs xx
Amber
Yeah, I’ve considered putting a pillow behind my back, there’s just not much room for one: I swear our bed must be smaller than average or something! I don’t have any discomfort while I’m sleeping, I just seem to keep rolling onto my back in the middle of the night for some reason ?
Claire
Oh bless you- I’ve had several friends go through the baby/gas/baby/gas? conundrum. And now I’m craving a good steak pie (and I’m not pregnant, just hungry!).
Jadine
Oh god, I was the same with the sleep positions worry! But my midwife reassured me that it didn’t matter whether you slept on your left or right side. They don’t recommend sleeping on your back once you’re heavily pregnant as it can make you go light-headed for some reason, but by that time you probably won’t feel comfortable sleeping on your back anyway! I did find that extra pillows (just normal ones) helped me stay comfy on my side. X
Amber
That’s reassuring to hear! I don’t think we could comfortably fit pillows between us in the bed, but we’re hoping to upgrade to a bigger bed soon, so I’ll just have to try and stay on my side until then!
Frida
Oh my, the gas ? but, seriously, no worries on that. You are going to feel your baby movement soon, and you will be absolutely sure it’s your baby and not gas! ? btw I was not able to feel my baby until 17/18 week, I remember clearly that it was just like.. a tiny tiny butterfly moving in my belly. And from then on, he was dancing and rolling and rumbling like crazy?
And about sleeping positions: don’t get too scared by those things, I think I slept almost my whole pregnancy on the right side and my son is perfectly healthy. And about sleeping on the back.. you are not yet at the point that it would be impossibile to do, so don’t worry about that, too. I slept on both sides with a little pillow or two under the belly and between my legs, and that was fine (even if sometimes when I could not sleep I was dreaming of getting that huge preggy cushion, but i did’t get it by the end and I didn’t miss it after all).
Kirsty
I didn’t feel proper, definite, non-gas movement with my first baby until after 16 weeks and she turned out 100% perfect! It will happen soon, I know it.
Sending love to Terry’s mum and all of you – it’s so tough. She’s lucky to have such a supportive family around her.
Chiarina
If it is any help, throughout my two pregnancies I slept however I felt most comfortable.. During most of the first one I slept flat on my back (because my breasts hurt in any other position) until the weight of my belly forced me on my side. The second time around I slept on my tummy (with a pillow under my hips when the belly started growing) until I could get away with it… (Then again on my side with loads of pillows to support me) Both my children are alive and well…
Tiffany
The sleep positions thing made me laugh. I always sleep on my right side. I’ve never been able to sleep on my back. Until I got pregnant. I would fall asleep on my side and wake up on my back every time. For reassurance, though, all my pregnancies were fine, despite the back sleeping. And all my kids are healthy and happy (when they aren’t determined to kill each other that is).
Jean
I didn’t feel movement until way beyond 17 weeks. I think I have the opposite of health anxiety, where I was all: Whatever. It’s fine. I have anxiety about tons of other stuff, though. I totally and completely applaud you for putting all this “out there” about your anxieties and continuing to write honestly, even when you receive “haters gonna hate” comments. I found a sleeping position I still use, based on some blogger at the time saying she wanted to sleep on her stomach so badly she dug a hole in the sand and feel asleep on her stomach for awhile. I kind of kick my leg up and around my stomach to kind of cushion it and add like a surrounding pillow. I’m sure it’s okay either way. The no back sleeping is because of lightheadedness. Thank you for letting my relive (positively!!!!) my first and only pregnancy. Best to you.
Amber
The study I linked to actually links back/right-side sleeping to stillbirth, not lightheadedness: as I said, I’ve no idea if it’s actually true, but it really frightened me!
Myra Boyle
I am so glad we never had google when I was pregnant – these studies would have had me bamboozled. I am very gullible and believe almost everything I see or hear about anything. They are both addictive and compelling reading. Try not to google anything about it and about parenting and trust your instincts (or your mum) when your baby arrives. Much love
Katie Dillard
I did’t feel baby move at all until 19 weeks, and that had me very worried! I am a lot like you in the sense of I believe a lot of the things I read online and psych myself out for no reason. I was so concerned with sleeping on my left side I started to lose sleep at night always trying to flip on my left. At my 20 week appointment I asked my doctor for her truth on the matter, and she told me that unless sleeping on your back is uncomfortable you can do whatever you want. She said of course there will come a time where sleeping on your back is not an option because it will be so uncomfortable. But it’s not dangerous (as she concluded) and that made me feel a lot better about just sleeping in whatever position I like. Your babe will start moving soon! Don’t stress too much 🙂
Amber
I’m glad I’m not the only one who does this – even when I know I’m not being rational, or that the risk is minimal, once I’ve heard something, I find it so hard not to worry about it. I’m still constantly paranoid that I’m going to inadvertently have a mouthful of one of the “forbidden” foods, even although I know perfectly well that, even if I did, it would be unlikely to cause any harm! I sometimes think there’s just way too much information thrown at you – it ends up making you (well, ME…) worry about every little thing you do!
The Other Emma
Had to stop reading at the bit about your 20 week scan being at 21 weeks to say on my second pregnancy I had my 20 week scan scheduled for 21 weeks and the reason given to me was that they can see more at 21 weeks on the scan and so are less likely to have to schedule you to come back for what could be an unnecessary follow-up scan. Have also had friends attend different maternity hospitals to me and they have been told the same thing. I live in Ireland so things could be different in Scotland but that may be why your scan is a bit later than expected.
Amber
It’s actually just scheduling in our case – they normally do it at 20 weeks here, but we’ve already spoken to them about it, and it was just the first appointment they had apparently ? They think they’ll be able to move it to 20 weeks, but we have to call back next week to do it for some reason!
Sarah Rooftops
I pretty much survived on cake last time around; I’m pretty sure most babies are made up of about 50% junk food.
I had one of those huge pregnancy pillows last time (which I would totally offer you but there’s no way I’m carting it to the post office; if you’re ever in Aberdeen etc etc); we called it The Third Human because it was so bulky. This time around, I’ve got a knee cushion (waaaaaaaaaay better than a normal cushion shoved between your knees) and – now that I’m a bit bigger – a bump wedge and, between them, they do a better job than the pregnancy pillow and are less hassle to adjust when I roll over in bed.
As for the sleep positions, ARGH WHY DO ALL THE PREGNANCY WEBSITES GO ON ABOUT THIS?!?!?! I had my antenatal physiotherapy class today and the physio was ranting about it: “All these women coming to me with sore hips, convinced they’re hurting their babies because they keep waking up on their backs – if you lie in a position which restricts blood flow, you will wake up, feel a little dizzy, change positions and NOT A SINGLE BIT OF HARM WILL HAVE BEEN DONE.” And I KNEW that, but, like you, I kept waking up on my back and there was a little voice in my head going “What if…?????” It was hugely reassuring to have a medical professional tell me otherwise. (I did reach a point last time around when it became uncomfortable to sleep on my back and, sure enough, my body very quickly stopped trying – perhaps our bodies kind of, sort of know what they’re doing after all?!)
Amy K
When you do start feeling your baby moving, there will probably be a day when you’re shocked at how rhythmically he/she is punching your innards. It’s HICCUPS! Nobody warned me about those, and I was absolutely stumped the first time it happened.
Fiona
Yes! About thirty weeks I started getting rhymthic little thumps in weird internal places (usually at about 3am!) took me a couple of weeks to realise they were hiccups. Now they’re strong enough to make my stomach jump so there’s no mistaking them.
Fiona
My pregnancy pillow is the best thing I ever bought. Seriously.
Even not pregnant I couldn’t sleep in one position all night so all the way through I’ve alternated between left and right. And from 35 weeks I’ve had to lie on my back as well as sometimes both hips hurt too much to lie on (but that’s with a few pillows propping me up so I’m not flat).
There might, might, MIGHT, be small risks from not sleeping on the left but if it’s a choice between that and not sleeping for weeks on end, which is really worse?
Amber
I am actually sleeping really well (I wish I could sleep like this when I’m *not* pregnant!), and I’ve never been in any discomfort – it’s just that I can’t seem to stop myself rolling onto my back while I’m asleep!
Rachael Dickinson
Can you please write a book about this? I know you have anxiety which is horrific BUT I do find you very funny!
I am 2 years TTC with several miscarriages and chem pregs and still going – I think this would make my life!!
Rachael xox
http://www.rachaeldickinson.com