My Bedroom is Being Haunted by a Mysterious Voice, and I’m Not Quite Sure What to Make of It, Really

Well, it’s finally happened: I’ve started hearing voices.

Luckily for me (or perhaps not, actually), Terry and Rubin have also been hearing the voices, so it would appear that what we’re dealing with here isn’t so much A Descent into Madness as it is a Haunting. (We’re also apparently dealing with Random Capitalisation of Words, but to be honest, that’s the least of my worries right now considering I’m HEARING VOICES, people, OMG!).

I heard the first Voice one day last week. I can’t remember which day it was, but it was towards the end of the week. Let’s call it “Thursday”. Anyway, it was about 3pm. Terry, Rubin and I were all in the office, with the door open onto the hall. At the end of the hall (which is only about two metres long), our bedroom door was also open.

It was from the bedroom that The Voice spoke.

Now, I don’t know what The Voice said, and neither does Terry, because he didn’t actually hear it that time. Rubin, however, also heard The Voice, and I know this because when It spoke, he looked towards the bedroom and then looked up at me as if to say, “Am I going crazy here, or is there A Voice in your bedroom right now?”

There was no Voice in the bedroom, though, as we Terry discovered when I made him go and check things out. In fact, I don’t think he even believed me, no matter how hard I tried to convince him that, yes! There had been a Voice! That said words! That I couldn’t quite make out! He insisted that it must have been someone outside in the street.

I was unconvinced by this. The Voice, you see, had been RIGHT THERE; it had only said one or two words, but when it said them it had clearly been standing just out of sight, IN OUR BEDROOM. Which was creepy, really. But I decided to go with Terry’s “someone in the street outside” theory, mostly because it was preferable to believing that I was either:

a) Mad

or

b) Being haunted

Then, on Monday, The Voice spoke again.

This time, Terry heard it too, as did Rubin. Again, it happened at about 3pm, and again, The Voice seemed to be coming from just inside our bedroom. It said one, or possibly two, words. Terry thought it said “Continue”. I thought it said, “Hey, you!” Rubin hasn’t offered a theory as to what The Voice said yet, but to be completely honest with you, Rubin’s theories are almost always pretty fantastical, so it’s probably just as well.

Anyway. We all rushed into the bedroom to investigate, Scooby Doo style. (Well. Obviously I rushed a little bit slower than Terry and Rubin did. Well, would YOU want to come face to face with a disembodied Voice? I think not.) Needless to say, there was nothing there. There was no one in the street outside. But there had been a VOICE. Again. And now I for one was good n’ freaked.

One thing we’d both noticed was that while obviously human, The Voice sounded a little bit robotic, almost like a recording. So, naturally we thought it must be coming from some kind of electrical item in the room.

Electrical items in the room at the time of The Second Speaking:

* Our phones. These are, of course, the chief suspects here, but neither of them showed any signs of having received a call or text, or carried out any kind of action. Mine had been right in front of me at the time of the First Speaking, so it was off the hook anyway, and Terry’s wouldn’t really know how to speak like that, even if it wanted to. So we don’t think it was them, but we’re keeping them under close observation

* Alarm clocks: well, they’ve never spoken before, and both make beeping noises rather than Voices, but we did check and no alarms were found to have been set.

* Hairdryer and straighteners: both mutes, and therefore innocent of all charges.

* Er, that’s it on the “electrical items” front.

So, it’s a mystery. And it’s a mystery I would quite like to have solved, thanks very much, because for the last two nights, every time I’ve woken up I’ve been horribly aware of the fact that, why, The Voice must’ve been standing right next to MY SIDE OF THE BED each time it spoke! And then I’ve had to lie there awake with my head under the covers, too scared to open my eyes in case I come face to face with The Voice. Or the body belonging to the voice, anyway. It would be pretty hard to come face to face with just a Voice. I hope.

We did, of course, notice that both pronouncements from The Voice happened at roughly the same time of day, so we were thinking this might be significant, but 3pm passed on both Tuesday and today without incident.

We’re stumped. If there are never any more posts here, though, and Terry and I should disappear under mysterious circumstances, please feel free to forward this post to the police. Or the Ghostbusters, maybe. Thanks.