Weird Scottish Things Only Scottish People Will Understand
OK, OK, ya got me: the headline of this post is pure hyperbole. The items on this list aren’t just “Scottish things”, and you don’t have to be Scottish to understand them or have experienced them. Let’s just get that out of the way before we go any further here. (i.e. don’t come at me…) If you’ve lived in Scotland, though, I’m pretty sure you might understand…
Having to dress for every possible type of weather, because it changes every 15 minutes.
Leaving the house? You’ll be needing your sunglasses AND an umbrella. Also sunscreen and a snowsuit.
People wearing their summer clothes as soon as the temperature hits double digits.
Taps aff!
“Rangers or Celtic?”
Give me strength…
Having to bite your tongue every time an American pronounces it “Edinboro”
ED-IN-BUR-UH. Say it with me, people…
Related: 14 Things You Absolutely Should Not Do When Visiting Scotland
Or an English person describes you as “Scotch”.
“Scotch” is a drink: I’m Scottish, thanks…
Being charged extra to travel from a Scottish airport.
No cheap holidays for you, then!
Discovering there are no direct flights to where you want to go anyway, so you’re going to have to go via London.
Prepare to get very familiar with the inside of Terminal 5.
Having to avoid Edinburgh for the entire month of August.
Just… no.
Being repeatedly asked if you play golf or drink whisky.
Nope – and I don’t eat deep friend Mars Bars or dink Irn Bru, either!
People assuming you party until you drop on ‘Hogmanay’, when you actually just watch the fireworks on TV, like everyone else you know.
I will NOT party like it’s 1999, and you cannot make me.
Having to keep explaining that “och aye the noo” doesn’t actually mean anything.
Literal translation: “Oh yes just now.” Say what?
Finding out that the word “outwith” isn’t used, er, outwith Scotland, and being absolutely amazed by it.
How do people even talk without this word?
Being expected to know or care which clan you’re allegedly part of
Look, this isn’t Outlander, you know: no one cares about clans!
Related: Things I learned about Scotland from Highland Romance Novels
Being invited to a wedding, but it’s a ceilidh and you can’t remember how to do any of the dances.
Because you learned them in primary school, and that was… let’s just say a WHILE ago.
People constantly making your fun of your accent
Not all Scottish people sound like Griundskeeper Willie, you know.
Being asked if you hate the English
No. Because I’m not a dick.
Not being able to get a decent bag of chips anywhere other than Scotland.
Salt and sauce, please…
Having to explain what ‘diluting juice’ is
Because we could never just call it “squash”.
Mother’s Pride bread (toasted) and Lurpak butter being an elite snack.
It really is, though.
A “bunker” being a worktop, not something to do with the war.
“Put your messages on the kitchen bunker.”
“Clapping” being something you do to pets
Clue: we are not giving them a round of applause…
Got any other ‘Scottish things’ you’d like to add to this list?
(not all Scottish people wear tartan, but when we do, we wear it with very high heels and designer sunglasses. Yes.)
RELATED:
Scottish Stereotypes That Are Blatantly Untrue
Things You Absolutely Should Not Do When Visiting Scotland
Things We Know About Scotland from Historical Romance Novels
Andreja Golob Verba Pontes
Belated Happy BDay 🙂
Leah
Happy birthday! For your birthday I would like to steal this whole outfit. And maybe be your dress size too.
It’s OH’s birthday today so we’re off for brunch, and I will look several hundred times less glamorous than you. Damnit.
Amber
Aww, thank you! Have a good lunch, and happy birthday to your OH!
Lisa Colombo
Happy Birthday Amber. Birthdays are meant to be celebrated all week.
Julie McCready
Wow. That outfit was made for you!!! The colours really make you pop! I think the stereotype that green is the BEST colour for redheads is sooo overrated and over used and more often than not- not the case but this totally works for you in all the right ways!
P.s happy birthday. A fellow pisces and redhead!
Linsey Humphrey
Lovely pictures as always, Amber. Hope you had a good birthday!
Sian
Even though you’re not a birthday person, I just have to say it anyway: happy birthday! And speedily moving on now…that skirt is gorgeous! I’m loving Collectif at the moment but had shied away a bit from the pencil skirts as the high waist is just…really high, if that makes sense, but it looks like I was wrong because it’s amazing!
I know what you mean with the weather too – we had one day where I managed to actually open the back door on our house and leave it open for a good few hours (we don’t have a cat flap, so that’s their only way of getting in and out and it gets tedious opening and closing it every half an hour…). I’m still on the lookout for these elusive nude fishnets though – never managed to find any!
Amber
I actually would prefer the waist to be a bit a lower – I normally wear this skirt with a sweater over the top of the waistband, so it doesn’t look as high, but this sweater was too long/baggy, so I had to tuck it! On the nude fishnets, have you tried Accessorize? I get most of mine from there (although these ones were a brand called Transparenze… I think!) – they’re a little darker and than I’d ideally like, but they last forever!
Katharine in Brussels
Hi Amber, hope you had a lovely birthday! Ah, minor adjustments to RTW clothing. Do I spy in my crystal ball a sewing machine in your future? Is that the distant future? Really though, I got my sewing machine for € 60 used and it is a workhorse, but admittedly it’s best to get one when you have a friend who knows how to sew and is willing to show you the ropes. If I lived in Scotland I’d help you out 🙂 but if you ever come to Brussels and want to try out a sewing machine, give us a shout!
Catherine
Happy birthday!
Katy
Happy belated birthday Amber!
Big fan of the green leather jacket. Sooo glad it’s time for jackets to make their appearance in the world, instead of coats!
Very important question: do you have a post written about how you keep your hair SO incredibly healthy/shiny? Cos I’m all levels of jealous and must learn your ways 🙂
Little Miss Katy | UK Lifestyle Blog
Amber
Oh, thank you! I actually don’t do anything special with my hair – I literally just shampoo and condition, normally with fairly cheap brands, too – I’m always being scolded by hairstylists for using brands like Tresemme or whatever, which are supposed to be SO bad for your hair, but I never really see that much difference, so I just go for the cheap option! I think the sun in these photos really helps, though – my hair always looks much shinier in the sunshine 🙂
Laura Pearson-Smith
This is just perfection, and suits your hair colour brilliantly x
Laura | A Life With Frills
CiCi Marie
I can never forget when the first day of spring is as it happens to be my boyfriend’s birthday too – and you’d think the blossom on the trees was all for his benefit, seriously! I don’t really mind the spring countdown though as I can’t wait for it to get here – I probably look forward to it more than christmas! Anyway, while we’re on birthdays I hope yours was fab and I love the skirt of course, and the way it so immaculately matches your jacket. I’ve been trying to drag my old leather jacket into outfits now it’s a bit warmer and funnily enough also reached for a Collectif pencil skirt – clearly a math made in heaven 😉
Suze
Happy Birthday for yesterday. Hope you had a lovely day and were suitably spoiled 🙂
Irene
Belated happy birthday!
We’re having our first day of spring weather in NYC today after a very harsh cold winter, so I’m really excited I might be able to wear something other than the same boring down coat and thick dark colored tights everyday. I’ve always been a hosiery enthusiast and before moving here I had amassed a large collection of stockings and tights, but in NY I only get to wear sheer hosiery for a short time in spring or autumn before it gets either too hot or too cold 🙁 I miss my seamed stockings!
And by the way, I could never get tired of seeing those shoes. I absolutely love them but as I don’t think I’d be able to walk in them, I must vicariously wear them through you 😀
Bex Miller
We’re birthday week twins! 😀 (mine was on Monday) I was glad it actually felt spring-y, it would have been too depressing to have snow again! x
Amber
Happy birthday!
Fran
Happy Birthday Amber! Also that outfit is insanely chic.
rakhshanda
You look brilliant Amber <3 Perfect from top to toe, the skirt, jacket and heels are absolutely gorgeous!! Plaid outfits are so classy and you make them look even better.
Wish you a very Happy Birthday honey (sorry for the late wishes :p) Glad to hear that spring's almost there in the highlands!
Amber
Thank you so much! (We’re quite a bit away from the highlands, but hopefully spring will get to all of us soon!)
Elizabeth @ Awesome Wave
These photos!
The light, the scenery, THAT outfit, your amazing hair.
All the thumbs up!!!!!!!!! And exclamations.
Are these photos taken morning or evening golden hour? They’re lush.
Amber
Oh, thanks! They were actually taken in the afternoon – I think we just got lucky with the light!
Jess
I LOVE this. You look so classy and put together.
Hope you had a lovely birthday.
Sarah
I love this outfit! I hope you had a great birthday.
Georgia
Your hair is amazingly beautiful!
Porcelina
Happy belated birthday!! You always look smashing in green x
Call me M
What a gorgeous outfit! You look amazing, and I love these colors on you!
Jamie Rose
This outfit looks amazing on you! I just love this dark green with your red hair. I think I need a green leather jacket like yours. I wish it was jacket season 80% of the year. I’m so jealous of your weather over there. I love moderate temperatures. Not too cold or hot. It’s just 80% warm/hot where I live.
Also happy belated birthday!
Marc Schmier
Lovely outfit, Amber. Especially the green color! 🙂