So, I’m going to be writing about ASOS a lot in this new shopping section. I mean, you all knew that, right? If it wasn’t obvious enough from the amount of clothes I BUY from ASOS, my gushing over them a few weeks ago would probably have done the trick. The thing is, though, ASOS is awesome. It just is. The site is updated daily, it’s reasonably affordable, and that’s without even THINKING about the dresses. OH GOD, THE DRESSES. Let’s talk about the dresses, shall we? Specifically the floral dresses. Most specifically, THIS floral dress:
The Queen of Floral Dresses: ASOS Beautiful Super Full Floral Prom Dress, £95
This isn’t just a full dress, people: this is a SUPER full dress. (Those are their words, by the way, not mine. They’re right, though.) Now, when it comes to the fullness of dresses, I like to take a “the bigger the better approach”: in fact my answer to the question, “how full is too full” would be “what a stupid question – why are you asking me this?” This dress has what ASOS describe as a “netted hem”, which I’m taking to mean a built-in petticoat. I’m possibly going out on a limb here, but I’m going to go ahead and name it the Queen of Floral Dresses. Feel free to disagree with me – it’ll just mean it’ll be less likely to sell out before it goes on sale (which, by the way, I’m counting on happening, because no way can I justify spending £95 on yet another dress I won’t get to wear).
If the first dress was the queen of floral dresses, this one is surely her handmaiden. It’s possible I’ve taken this analogy too far now, though, so I’ll stop. I’ll just say, however, that, in addition to floral dresses, I’m also a sucker for anything with a bardot neckline: this dress actually comes in a few different floral prints, so it’s almost as if it’s been sent to test me.
This dress is exclusive to the ASOS Tall range, which makes me want to cry hot, salty tears of despair, because if there’s one thing I am not, it’s tall. I’m going to have to leave this one to my tall readers, who I hope will think of me when they wear it. In a totally non-creepy way, obviously.
A “wiggle hem” didn’t sound like something I’d like, so I watched the video on the ASOS website, and as far as I can gather, there’s a structured kind of something-or-other in the hem – almost like an old-fashioned hoop skirt, but much more flexible, so it “wiggles” rather than just sticking out rigidly. I suspect I’d have to try this one in person to decide whether I’m down with that or not, but I do love the floral print, and that’s half the battle.
Finally, I felt like I should include something that didn’t have a full skirt, so here’s ASOS’s ‘Hitchcock’ dress:
This is actually one of several floral print dresses they’ve made in this shape (Which they’ve called ‘Hitchcock’, for reasons best known to themselves…), so if you like floral print dresses, but you prefer them to have a wiggle shape, it’s worth checking back regularly, because I’ve seen this style go down to as little as £22 in the sale. So you won’t actually need to rob a bank to pay for this one: I might have been exaggerating just a little bit when I said that…