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o, now that we have (most of) the house organised, it’s time to move onto my wardrobe – which is a much trickier prospect.The problem here, you see, is that I have plenty of clothes that “spark joy” – if we’re going by the Marie Kondo method of organising and clearing out. I just don’t have any reason whatsoever to actually WEAR them. Which is a problem, really.
Like, I have this absolutely beautiful white dress, for instance. Gorgeous. And, I mean, OK, it’s just from ASOS, so it’s not like it’s some super-special vintage piece that you’d want to pass down through the generations or anything. But, to me, it’s perfect. Beautiful cut, lovely fabric, great fit: the kind of dress that, as soon as I laid eyes on it, I thought, “Dress, you will be mine!” And it was so.
But that was… ooh, maybe four years ago now? Five? And I have NEVER worn that dress. Not ever. Because, the fact is, it might be beautiful, but it’s totally and utterly impractical: not just for the life I have now, as the mother of a toddler, but even for the life I had four years ago, when I first bought it. I mean, no matter how you spin it, this dress is a summer party dress, really. The only kind of “summer party” that would be fancy enough for it, though, would be a wedding or similar, and not only are there no wedding invitations winging their way to me right now (Or not that I know of, anyway), even if there were, I’m old fashioned enough to believe you don’t wear white to a wedding, so it wouldn’t be much use for that either.
Why did I buy it, then, I’m going to pretend to hear you ask?
Because, four or five years ago, that was how I shopped. Randomly. Impulsively. Er, stupidly. I’d see something I loved, and I’d feel like I absolutely HAD to have it, regardless of whether or not I was likely to actually WEAR it any time soon.
I don’t do that any more.
No, these days I’m happy to say that I’ve stuck to my resolution to only buy clothes I know I’m going to wear – and wear often. Clothes I know I’m going to get my money’s worth out of. I no longer want to have a closet filled with party dresses when I spend most of my days at soft play, or wriggling my way under the couch on my stomach to retrieve a stray building block or toy car. To be totally honest, it makes me feel a little bit sick to think of all of the money I’ve spent over the years on beautiful clothes that have rarely – or never – been worn, and, because of that, I’ve actually found it quite easy to stop buying them. Sure, I still have my moments of weakness, but, for the most part, I’m no longer tempted by the clothes I won’t wear, and am concentrating instead on building a wardrobe full of ones I WILL.
That doesn’t make it any easier to get rid of those ‘perfect’ pieces that gave me so much pleasure to buy, though, and which still ‘spark joy’ – for want of a better phrase – when I pull them out of the wardrobe and look at them. That beautiful white dress, for instance, has survived every single wardrobe clear-out I’ve had for the past four years now – and when I came across it again last week, I still struggled to throw it on the ‘donate’ pile. I mean, I’m pretty sure that if I get rid of it, I’ll instantly be invited to exactly the kind of event it would be perfect for – but then, if I don’t, I’m equally sure it’ll just languish in the closet for another 4 – 5 years.
For now, it’s in the ‘I’ll Think About This Later’ pile. But I think I know what I have to do…
LindaLibraLoca
February 5, 2019I can absolutely relate to that problem – it is easy not to buy them, but almost impossible to get rid of them. I have a few similar items that I just can´t seem to clear out!
Anne – Linda, Libra, Loca
Alicja
February 5, 2019Maybe before letting it go, try to take a photo of it on you to have a nice memory “forever”?
Then giving it a second life should be much more easy 🙂
Helen Baker
February 5, 2019I think if you had 50 perfect-for-the-party-I-never-get-to-go-to dresses, then you might need to (just) (maybe) think about considering perhaps getting rid of a couple of them. But this perfect dress sounds like something you should keep. It’s always handy to have a few special occasion outfits as they can be a nightmare to find when you need them. And…this could be the perfect dress to have copied into a wedding appropriate fabric if the need arose!
lalie
February 5, 2019what a good idea! A friend of mine dyed a white dress so she could wear it at weddings – it was quite a brave move but that particular dress still looked beautiful.
lalie
February 5, 2019your white dress sounds perfect for a nice holiday dinner! It should have been in your suitcase when you went away last winter!
Amber
February 5, 2019Alas, white dresses and toddlers don’t mix well, I’m afraid, and it was a very casual kind of place – I’d have felt really out of place in something so formal when everyone else was in shorts!
Jean
February 5, 2019You’re singing my tune. I have worked at home for 15 years, after formerly living in New York, where I loved dressing up each day (even though I was merely traveling to a boring office job). Many/most people in New York dress up every day. I couldn’t seem to stop the buying/thrifting habit for a long time after working from home. I then had two children. And aged. And my life has changed a lot. But those beautiful dresses (mainly dresses) are so very hard to get rid of. Yet a big part of me knows I’ll never wear them again. And now I feel too old to “carry off” a number of them. They’re still in my closet. Guilting me.
Dee
February 5, 2019I hear this so much. I have about twenty dresses in my wardrobe, and every day I open it and realise that eighteen of them are far too dressy for what I actually do on a normal day (working from home). Thing is, it’s so hard to find casual dresses that I actually like, and so easy to find fancy ones!
Jill stylishatsixty
February 6, 2019I can so relate to what you are saying! As my child was growing and I didn’t have the same available free money I did curb this habit but now I am out the other end I have slipped back into my old ways.
Amber DeSadier
February 6, 2019I feel much the same and have the added bonus that my new post baby body is just SLIGHTLY different than my old one and clothes don’t fit the same. I can’t put a pin in exactly what has changed or how it exactly changes the look, but it does. Buying a whole new wardrobe is expensive and frustrating.